Sunday, June 28, 2009

a walk through target

A walk through Target should be an easy task. I love target and when we lived in Hawaii I couldn't wait to spend my days walking through target. When I was pregnant my favorite thing to do was walk through the baby aisle, but now I try to map my way throughout the store without having to pass by the baby aisle. This is not an easy task in our Target.

Somedays I can walk through the store and glance at the baby section and somedays I have to walk through the store with my head turned so I wont even look at it. The anxiety that hits when we round the corner of the shoe section makes me crazy. Will today be the day I can look? or will I have to turn away and pretend it's not there? Everytime I go it's different. The crib that we bought Bryanna just a week prior to going into the hospital is on display..if that isn't bad enough the display is set up for a little girl. Everytime we go in the store I try to avoid the crib all together. Just recently I've began to look at the crib and pray that one day it will hold a baby for us. For now the crib sits in the garage.

Today as I was walking through target I went down the opposite way because I was looking at sleepwear for myself. I happened to be in the mood today to look at the little girls clothing. I tried to keep walking but the little girl's dresses called me in. They were so cute..cute little summer dresses that had things been different Bryanna could have been wearing. I know I can't think like this, but so close to the due date it's hard not to.

I miss my little angel so much right now. I miss her everyday but somedays its just hits me more then others. I'm not going to lie..the next two days will most likely be rough for me, but I'm extremly thankful that my husband has taken the next two weeks off to be with me.


  1. I still think you are doing wonderful. Hang in there sweetheart, it will get easier. I'm so glad Bryan is there with you. :)

  2. :) I'm glad Bryan is with you too.